Thunderstorms in the highveld are common. In life being battered by storms is a given. Sometimes it’s a constant grey, like the weather in the UK. It can get tiring. I know. 

But for just a second, imagine the rainbow. Imagine the beautiful colours after the storm. Imagine them against the crystal blue backdrop of the sky and remember this promise.  

Genesis 9:13-17

“I establish my covenant with you: Never again will life be cut off by the waters of a flood; never again will there be a flood to destroy the earth."

All storms will eventually end. Don’t give up. Imagine the sun. 

Rainbows signal hope. My niece casually asked me for one this year:

‘What would you like for your birthday, Tanishka?’

‘A rainbow Reesha Foi.’ 

No biggy I’ll work on that, I thought, while the sky grumbled in the distance. 

Children are full of hope and wonder and innocence resides in the heart of every child. Innocence, curious ambition, and elements of daring madness exist in children. They are a reminder that once upon a time, we were children too. And life was black and white. There had to be answers to questions. In my case there were many. But have you noticed that as we age, we don’t ask enough questions? We settle. We settle in many areas of our life and life starts to become comfortable.

This year has had its fair share of storms. To be honest some days it hailed bowling balls, and the only way I knew how to drown out the noise was to fall asleep. There’s been death, pain, loss, heartbreak, injury, and a lot of lonely isolated moments by myself. But on the flip side of this pancake, there’s also been a heck of a lot of priceless moments and raucous laughter. 

At the end of October, I touched down at Lanseria, clutching three bottles of really good wine. I had one goal. To celebrate. 

I popped the cork of the first bottle two days later and I enjoyed the first glass with my brother. It was heaven. I savoured that moment on the table with my family. Spending time with them is as good as a bag of Cadbury Whispers. I can never get enough. 

Moments like these make life sweeter. To the many, many friends who have lost a parent, parents, a wife, husband, child, cousin, sister, brother, friend, niece, nephew, brother, sister, lover, ex-lover, or an acquaintance, you are on my heart. 

Life’s fragility is once again on full display as we enter another Covid wave. There will be many more tears, more gut-wrenching scenarios, unbelievable amounts of pain, and days when we all feel overwhelmed and isolated. 

I am using this opportunity to remind you of the rainbow. Don’t give up. 

Lean on friends. Don’t lean on friends. Talk, write, sleep, rest, scream underwater, scream on dry land, ask questions, shut yourself off - grieve. 

Be kind to yourself. 

Godly wisdom bursts through the pages of Proverbs and I’ve been stuck in that book in the Bible for a very long time. One verse, in particular, makes me dwell deeply on how to manage life’s emotions and trauma, its ups, and downs. Some moments are so tough that it feels like my DNA will change. But it doesn’t. Instead, time passes and is lost. The sun goes down, comes up and the heart starts to settle in its new environment. 

Lean on the understanding that seasons change.

 Proverbs 24:5-6. 

“5 Wisdom brings strength, and knowledge gives power. 6 Battles are won by listening to advice and making a lot of plans.”

Breathe, listen and plot ways to see that rainbow. 

Don’t give up.

Last month I settled in my rainbow season. And I’m not writing about it to gloat. I want to fill your heart with wonder and hope. In early October I had committed to adopting another kitten. I was very nervous to look after a baby and wondered if I was capable. Of course, I was. But I was just being hindered by the doubts of the devil. A few weeks later in the coastal town of Hermanus, I knew in my heart that life was going to alter. I fell asleep in front of a man on video chat. I was fragile and tender from a marathon but totally at peace with my life. That man, who watched me doze off is unafraid of my daring madness. The scars of my past, the ones he knows of, don’t disgust him. He pushes none of my buttons and meets my fire with calm. 

We are dating. 

As for the kitten. 

She is a warm, furry piece of work and just a tad mad. But they say pets mimic their owners. 

Eva is everything I imagined and more. She is fun, curious, funny, jealous of my beau and she scratches everything. She has scratched me bleeding, but I cannot handle the sound of her crying when I punish her. She honestly fills my home with so much and she’s so tiny. Caring for and watching her grow is pure magic with extra tinsel and a unicorn. To be spoilt and feel loved the way I have been these last few weeks has been beautiful and if I had to describe my happiness levels it wouldn’t be ecstatic. My cup simply is running over. 

I am in my rainbow season. 

I am experiencing all shades of brightness despite a running injury. And that makes me a tad sad but I’m choosing to look at the positives and rest when I can. 

This December two special occasions will see more wine flow. 

God willing, I’ll still be in my rainbow season. But if I am not remind me of the rainbow will you.