As I write I just listened to the President’s say goodnight to us. ‘God bless South Africa and protect her.’

His slow measured speech just broke the news that another person has died of Covid-19 in our country. I am devastated.

Three deaths. Three families torn apart and missing a loved one. Three funerals that will have to be censored. Three people…my God!

My heart knows that what’s going on is out of all of our control and that everything is in God’s hands but I can’t help feeling thoroughly upset tonight. I’m upset at the loss of life and how reckless some people are being with theirs, and with mine. I’m upset with the parents of the kids in my complex, who persistently gather for a games of hide and seek. I’m upset that there is a shortage of masks and protective gear for our medical fraternity. I’m upset because I saw a man running down Main rd, towards William Nicol this morning, and to my horror that I actually know him.

I know that when I begin to pray later my prickles of anger will eventually evaporate, but for now, I am upset. And it’s a stark contrast to how I felt when my eyes opened at 5h00.

Bubbling with excitement before 8am I zipped up my Banana Republic boots, only worn on special occasions, and headed to work for the first time since the lockdown. These boots are a symbol of love because it was given to me by my good friend and neighbor, Oratile. Her mum had bought this pair for her in the States and it didn’t fit her. So she asked me to try them on and when they fitted, she so kindly told me to keep it. They make me feel like a million bucks. That and a good lipstick and I needed to feel like a million bucks.

Work leveled me out again and I felt normal for the first time in three days. The rush of live news, communicating, making mistakes and writing stories gives me such life. And the highlight of course was seeing my team. I truly love them and and the way we work.

I also realised as I pulled into the parking lot that I have an opportunity to run when I work. Our parking lot is quite massive and I’m sure if I try, I can comfortably run a 5km. So I’ve packed my running shoes for work tomorrow. It’s a victorious moment for me because it feels like I’ve stumbled on a new route. And if you’re a runner, you can relate to the euphoria and excitement of a new route. Bye, bye monotony and hello eNCA parking lot.

While at work, I received a message from a friend of a friend who had tried my chocolate date cluster recipe. Seeing my tiny balls of heaven on her kitchen counter was very gratifying. Just look at my cover photo, aren’t those balls pretty. Haha…

Often when I blog I wonder whether anyone will even try my recipes. I doubt myself often and I think it’s healthy to doubt. But I do try and not do that too often because it does tend to lend a hand to discouragement and I can get discouraged very easily.

My drive to work and back was surprising to say the least. I had imagined cops stationed somewhere along my route, but I didn’t see not a single one. I did however see a few cars on the road. I wondered where all these people were going and if they were sick or sick of being at home. Did they need something from the grocery store? Where were they going? On my way home, I stopped off at Woolworths for some fresh vegetables and fruit.

As I was searching for celery, a lady who looked to be in her 50’s approached me to tell me I have wonderful legs. I just smiled because compliments make me shy. So shy in fact that I feel a thousand tiny spears prick into my neck giving rise to an awkwardness in my body. The once-bullied child in me still finds it difficult to respond, but today I did. We started chatting and after a little while I thought about whether this would have happened if we weren’t in lockdown. Would this lady have been so bold and friendly to a stranger? Would I have been this friendly? The exchange gave me pause and I couldn’t stop thinking about her for a while after I got home. She was cheery and her spirit made me cheery. I didn’t even get her name.

At home, I quickly made cauliflower soup for supper, took some pictures, exercised and watched three episodes of Frankie and Grace. It got dark quickly today because today was overcast and rainy. I did however spot the crescent shape of the moon from my upstairs balcony. It looked so bright and beautiful like a wilted unicorn horn without the unicorn. I blew it a kiss from my balcony and thought of my dad who lied to me when I was little about a man being on the moon. ‘Who do you think switches the lights on at the moon?’ he once asked. I’ll leave that exchange to your imagination but I’m sure you know how that unfolded. Of course I fell for that nonsense and if you’re wondering if I repeated that to other people. The answer is yes, I did. I even added my own spice and told kids in my grade 3 class that the moon was made out of cheese.